The rope, the bullet, the hose, the pills, the heart

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

Yes it will be a grace if I die. To exist is pain. Life is no desire of mine anymore. No more seat belts, looking both ways, speed limits, rules. Fuck this world.

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May

Clear off the couch

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

Maybe my gift to my mom will crashing on her couch wherever I find her. May be early for my appointment.

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Apr

Finishing up loose ends.

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

I was able to make 1 of 3 apologies I owe people and this was the one weighting me for over a year. The other 2 I could care less about. Shopping around for discount pre-pay cremation services and trying to get the important stuff in the house marked should someone other than myself need […]

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Apr

Protected: Choices & How They Affect Others..

Posted by JC Published in Uncategorized

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

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Mar

Not working

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

No medication can make me happy. No amount of money can make me happy. Nothing seems to be working. www.vice.com/en/article/m7amgx/china-death-steel-furnace-stock-market www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9422277/Lee-Macmillan-viral-star-vanlife-travel-account-takes-life.html These are one case that even asking for help and receiving it failed. The guy jumping into a furnace is brilliant. No way to fail.

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Mar

Thoughts

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

Do you ever tell people things in passing over a long period of time like.. “Oh, I’d open up all my social media if I started really getting dark” and a year later and nobody notices? Covid has made the recluse part easy. Distancing from almost everyone. I’ve not seen Cassie in over a year, […]

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Mar

If..

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

“If I commit suicide, it will not be to destroy myself, but to put myself back together again. Suicide will be for me only one means of violently reconquering myself, of brutally invading my being, of anticipating the unpredictable approaches of God. By suicide, I reintroduce my design in nature, I shall for the first […]

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Feb

Do we welcome it?

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

Suicide only really frightens those who are never tempted by it and never will be, for its darkness only welcomes those who are predestined to it. Georges Bernanos

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Feb

Thoughts

Posted by JC Published in Daily Stuff

When I was writing some letters should something go south I came across an ironic explanation to why I’m still here. – Suicide is a form of murder – premeditated murder. It isn’t something you do the first time you think of doing it. It takes getting used to. And you need the means, the […]

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Feb