Early 8a-1030p.. #spf30

It’s been 1 year since I watched you take your last breath and brushed your hair as we listened to wake up little Susie. They had the monitors muted so when you left everyone kinnda looked around and said a pray or figured out what to do next. Over the next 20 hours we would have everything set and Patrick and Cassie were cranking away at your obituaries and I was in fight mode and trying to stay busy.
I miss you. I may have found you by now but that’s not in the cards for now. I’m still trying to get everything done.

Today had been a day of not sleeping but laying still listening to white noise and not that alt band Trump loves.
My neck is stiff as a board from medications and I took my 6pm dose to realize I forgot to eat and with all the drama this weekend and Monday I’ve yet to make it to the store. So Mac & Cheese at midnight it will be. Was mad at the postal service this AM because my packages arriving at both mail drops didn’t show up as out for delivery until they delivered. So I was thinking Patrick’s present was lost in Dallas. My carrier got it to me today!
May start a gofundme account for bills. You would be so proud of me I’ve only splurged on 2 things since being fired. It’s the darn electric bill which is lower because I’m only using a few fans and my phones. I never leave the cave since there’s no TV unboxed in the house. A big 52″ one I hope to get gone because that $ has to cover my surgery on Friday morning (got a ride).
Ok enough rambling, worried about 2 friends that are off the grid but I can’t say I’ve been on it much. The leap year thing last year has my emotions a day early and I just want to get past these next 2 anniversaries.
Please leave a comment so I know people are even reading or I’ll give up. Except Jen, her IP checks this page even when she hates me. Which I think someone does but I’m afraid to ask.
Ok, sleep.. Ready set.. Be safe kids

Made a brief appearance to wish Patrick a happy birthday and ended up running across something that could possibly be tied to me or not. Then I got hit with a flashback that had me dropping away again..

Where do you start? Unemployed & Uninsured sucks..

Opening Timphop and seeing the last picture I took of mom responsive and knowing it was me. I don’t know where the image came from but I’m afraid what today’s will hold.

I have oral surgery this week, I have estate lawyers going over everything again and I have started the process of organizing my estate and handling should I not make it to Mars.

Spending the last 14 hours on pain pills and antibiotics suck…

Today is Patrick’s Birthday and of course the one time Amazon has failed me on 2 day. So I’m trying to see if thinkgeek.com has what I ordered in stock at the mall.

Sorry so random, that’s how I’m operating today. Still in shock from a shitstorm of emotions and personal issues with health continuing to decline.

Seems I popped on FB for a few hours and see that I inadvertently inserted my foot into my mouth. Of course I had no clue what I said would sound so bad. I regret my choice but anyone that knows me, knows I don’t have a filter when it comes to sometimes sensitive matters.

But hey you can get sun screen at Amazon.com for the sun or maybe that trip to Mars (see image)

For those not playing along. I broke a tooth Friday and was supposed to be enjoying the lake today but I was on the wait list for 2 dental offices. My lower left K9 chipped away at the base and pretty much is open to the root. I’ve been taking maximum doses of ibprofin and Tylox and still feel like needles are poking my eyes out. I have gauze packed with tooth gel and it’s not helping. I handle pain well. I didn’t cry when I broke my collarbone or when I dropped an ice pick from freezer into the floor via my foot. Not a tear.. I’m crying like a bitch tonight. And I can’t get in until Monday. I think I’m going to research self extraction or try what a mental job did and shoot out the offending tooth. However I would put a hole in my cheek. Or brain. I will commit to what will make the pain stop.

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So Friday night I saw a great deal on a TV.. Mind you I haven’t had one in over a year and thought a TV about 22″ would be about right. I found a $308 4K TV and clicked on Walmart website and used the free shipping.

FML

New 55″ TV bigger than my car