Wow what a week. I’ve had a few highs like hanging out with a newish friend at the park and just sitting around talking to low like sleeping thru Fri-Sat welll 11am Fri-2am Sunday morning. Needless to say I only woke up to change snack, brush & put in new elastics then back to sleep. I did get a call Friday letting me know my car will be back Monday or Tuesday.
Work has been getting better and I’m back in a pattern I was in over 2 years ago and is a much more productive way of doing things. This poses a small problem of I don’t have enough projects to fill my time. I’ve got a few ideas and when we hit the top of the month I’m sure I’ll get a nice few. This last week we had 2 good breaking news situations which means standing up and managing about 10 points of communications and being the hub. It sucked when we had 3 wrecks all in the range of 4 square miles and 1 of them included a school bus. Now what sucked with so many fire crews and PD to figure out wich of the 4 had the 34 students on board with 4 complaining of neck and back problems. Parents showing up on the highway parking in lanes of traffic was a big mess. I think this week I went dry before 7 3 times. dry = Drank 52oz already.
Detox has still shown some things like I don’t have the magic jumping leg as much but still have memory issues and I need to call and make my appt. with the Memory doctor. I’ve been cheating my meds a bit duiring the day so I could sleep daytime also. I’ve not been messing with my night time drugs. Face is still a battlefield and I’m fighting that fight every day. I want to get a med for my face but thats another pill and med and thats NOT what we want now is it?.. I find it strange that most people have not cared enough to ask about the changes or are keeping to them selves.
I saw Dolphins Tale with Cass on Sunday and MoneyBall on Friday solo. Both of these movies were good and worth the $. Did church before going to the movie Sunday w/Cass then to Cheders for lunch.
Things I still need to work on are regulating daytime activities and the “want” to do them. I need to figure out why I haven’t been wanting to do things since my changeover. I talk to someone thats actively in “Depression therapy classes” and she says I sound depressed. I talk to my best friend and she says since I’m always hyper maybe I’m just bored. I don’t know which it is but I will need to make the change soon to add that 4th element.
I’ve about given up on any workable relationship in regards to romantic or best friend with the exception of Cass. She is what makes me know there are good people in this world. I wish I could make some BIG statment saying I AM REBUILDING but ummm not much to throw away other than 3 Females that have more issues than TV Guide in a year. I’m willing to take a few issues even just play with someone but to much is to much.
PS. I cut my thumb nail to short so every space is a OUCH. This was a painful blog.
Enjoy the rambleness.
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